The Last Chardonnay

First a bit of terminological history, to clear up any confusion about the meanings of “sociopath,” “psychopath,” and related terms: In the early 1800s, doctors who worked with mental patients began to notice that some of their patients who appeared outwardly normal had what they termed a “moral depravity” or “moral insanity,” in that they seemed to possess no sense of ethics or of the rights of other people. The term “psychopathy” was first applied to these people around 1900. The term was changed to “sociopath” in the 1930s to emphasize the damage they do to society. Currently researchers have returned to using the term “psychopath.” Some of them use that term to refer to a more serious disorder, linked to genetic traits, producing more dangerous individuals, while continuing to use “sociopath” to refer to less dangerous people who are seen more as products of their environment, including their upbringing. Other researchers make a distinction between “primary psychopaths,” who are thought to be genetically caused, and “secondary psychopaths,” seen more as products of their environments. The current approach to defining sociopathy and the related concepts is to use a list of criteria. The first such list was developed by Hervey Cleckley (1941), who is known as the first person to investigate psychopaths using modern research techniques. Anyone fitting enough of these criteria counts as a psychopath or sociopath. There are several such lists in use. The most commonly used is called the Psychopathy Checklist Revised (PCL-R). An alternative version was developed in 1996 by Lilienfeld and Andrews, called the Psychopathic Personality Inventory (PPI). The book that psychologists and psychiatrists use to categorize and diagnose mental illness, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), includes a category for “antisocial personality disorder” (APD), while the World Health Organization delineates a similar category it calls “dissocial personality disorder.” Roughly only 1 in 5 people with APD is a psychopath (Kiehl and Buckholtz, 2010).If we overlay all of these lists of criteria, we can see them coalescing into the following core set of traits:1. UncaringThe PCL describes psychopaths as being callous and showing a lack of empathy, traits the PPI describes as “coldheartedness.” The criteria for dissocial personality disorder include a “callous unconcern for the feelings of others.” Several lines of evidence point to a biological grounding for the uncaring nature of the psychopath. For us, caring is a largely emotion-driven enterprise. Psychopaths have been found to have weak connections among the components of the brain’s emotional systems. These disconnects are responsible for the inability to feel emotions deeply. Psychopaths are also not good at detecting fear in the faces of other people (Blair et al., 2004). The emotion of disgust also plays an important role on our ethical sense. We find certain types of unethical actions disgusting; this works to keep us from engaging in them and makes us express disapproval of them. But psychopaths have extremely high thresholds for disgust, as measured by their reactions when shown disgusting photos of mutilated faces and when exposed to foul odors. One promising new line of research is based on the recent discovery of a brain network responsible for understanding the minds of others. Called the default mode network (because it also performs other tasks and is operating most of the time when we are awake), it involves a cluster of several different areas in the brain’s cortex. The first studies have been done on the function of this network in psychopaths, and as expected, they have noted “aberrant functional connectivity” among its parts of the network, along with reduced volume in some of the network’s crucial areas. 2. Shallow Emotions Psychopaths and, to a degree, sociopaths, show a lack of emotion, especially social emotions such as shame, guilt, and embarrassment. Cleckley said that the psychopaths he came into contact with showed a “general poverty in major affective reactions,” and a “lack of remorse or shame.” The PCL describes psychopaths as “emotionally shallow” and showing a lack of guilt. Psychopaths are notorious for a lack of fear. When other people are put into an experimental situation in which they anticipate that something painful will happen, such as a mild electric shock or mildly aversive pressure applied to a limb, a brain network activates. Normal people will also show a clear skin conductance response, produced by sweat gland activity. In psychopathic subjects, however, this brain network shows no activity, and no skin conductance responses are emitted (Birbaumer et al., 2012).3. IrresponsibilityAccording to Cleckley, psychopaths show unreliability, while the PCL mentions “irresponsibility,” and the PPI describes psychopaths as showing “blame externalization,” i.e. they blame others for things that are actually their fault. They may admit blame when forced into a corner, but these admissions are not accompanied by a sense of shame or remorse, and have no power to change future behavior.4. Insincere SpeechRanging from what the PCL describes as “glibness” and “superficial charm,” to Cleckley’s “untruthfulness” and “insincerity,” to outright “pathological lying,” there is a trend toward devaluing speech itself among psychopaths by inflating and distorting it toward selfish ends. The criteria for APD include “conning others for personal profit or pleasure.” One concerned father of a young sociopathic woman said, “I can’t understand the girl, no matter how hard I try. It’s not that she seems bad or exactly that she means to do wrong. She can lie with the straightest face, and after she’s found in the most outlandish lies she still seems perfectly easy in her own mind” (Cleckley, 1941, p. 47). This casual use of words may be attributable to what some researchers call a shallow sense of word meaning. Psychopaths do not show the differential brain response to emotional terms over neutral terms that other people do (Williamson et al., 1991). They also have trouble understanding metaphors and abstract words.5. OverconfidenceThe PCL describes sociopaths as possessing a “grandiose sense of self worth.” Cleckley speaks frequently of the boastfulness of his patients. Hare (1993) describes an imprisoned sociopath who believed he was a world-class swimmer.6. Narrowing of AttentionAccording to Newman and his colleagues, the core deficit in psychopathy is a failure of what they call response modulation (Hiatt and Newman, 2006). When most of us engage in a task, we are able to alter our activity or modulate our responses, depending on relevant peripheral information that appears after the task has begun. Psychopaths are specifically deficient in this ability, and according to Newman, this explains their impulsivity, a trait which shows up in several of the lists of criteria, as well as their problems with passive avoidance and with processing emotions.Top-down attention tends to be under voluntary control, whereas bottom-up attention happens involuntarily. But bottom-up attention can temporarily capture top-down attention, as when movement in the periphery of our visual field attracts our attention. Psychopaths have trouble using top-down attention to accommodate information that activates bottom-up attention during a task. In other people, this process tends to happen automatically. When a hunter is scanning for deer, a rabbit hopping into the periphery of his visual field automatically attracts his attention. Top-down attentional processes monitor the field of attention for conflicts and resolve them. The standard means of assessing this is the Stroop Task, in which a subject must read color words which are printed in ink of a conflicting color, such as “red” printed in blue ink. Several studies indicate that psychopaths actually perform better than other people on these tasks (Hiatt et al., 2004; Newman et al., 1997).7. SelfishnessCleckley spoke of his psychopaths showing a “pathologic egocentricity [and incapacity for love],” which is affirmed in the PPI’s inclusion of egocentricity among its criteria. The PCL also mentions a “parasitic lifestyle.”8. Inability to Plan for the FutureCleckley’s psychopaths showed a “failure to follow any life plan.” According to the PCL, psychopaths have a “lack of realistic long-term goals,” while the PPI describes them as showing a “carefree nonplanness.”9. ViolenceThe criteria for dissocial personality include a “very low tolerance to frustration and a low threshold for discharge of aggression, including violence.” The criteria for antisocial personality disorder include irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults.Philosophers can play a valuable role here in discerning the consequences of all of these findings for our attempts to build an ethical society. Several questions need addressing: What does the possibility that psychopathy is genetic say about human nature? What steps can we take to “correct” psychopaths, and which is the most ethical? If it is true that psychopaths have damaged or abnormal brains, can we hold them responsible for what they do? Are there degrees of psychopathy, so that normal people may possess psychopathic traits?William Hirstein PhDFull article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindmelding/201706/9-clues-you-may-be-dealing-psychopath%3famp

Triangulation is one of the favorite manipulation tools used by narcissists and sociopaths. It can also be a learned behavior that many people engage in who have grown up with a narcissistic parent or dysfunctional family dynamic. However, I think it’s important in any kind of relationship, that we learn to identify the early warning signs and red flags when interacting with people who display narcissistic and toxic behaviors. This way we can better protect ourselves from being exploited, and abused, and make good decisions about who we allow into our lives.

I am going to describe the 4 most common methods of triangulation used by narcissists and toxic people, and the motives behind them.

Narcissists are keen observers. They can identify a kind and generous individual the same way a Great White shark can smell one drop of blood in the ocean, from up to one mile away. Narcissists are also skilled observers. Their main goal is to control and dominate their partners and, well, just about everyone they come into contact with. This is why the love-bombing phase is so key to the narcissist’s success. No matter how confident and self-assured you are at the beginning of the relationship, the constant attention, flattery and fraudulent declarations of love that sweeps you off your feet, both literally and figuratively, leaves you off-balance and vulnerable by default.

Triangulation can be defined as an indirect form of communication where one person (usually the narcissist) acts as a messenger between two other people. Or it can be a direct form of communication where one person attempts to draw in an accomplice, to gang up against a third party, to further their agenda. In both cases, the messenger will fabricate or alter a message, often incorporating a sliver of the truth, to advance his/her objective. There are as many different reasons why a narcissist might use triangulation as there are narcissists, but here are the four most common methods and motives.

1. Killing two birds with one stone

To obtain control, attention or adulation, narcissists will often inform their partner about how a third-party, such as a mutual friend or co-worker, has been flirtatious with them. This third-party person is brought into the relationship to kill two birds with one stone! First, it stirs up feelings of jealousy and insecurity in their partner, and subtlety warns the partner that they are potentially replaceable. Instinctively, the partner tries harder to please the narcissist, as to not be replaced. Second, it creates an illusion of desirability and encourages rivalry, both of which, fill the narcissist with narcissistic supply, consisting of adulation and control.  So, not only does the narcissist get his/her dose of supply, he/she also increases the amount of power he/she wields over their partner.

Emotionally healthy people do not invoke feelings of jealousy and insecurity in their partners, or into their relationships, as they know these are big relationship no-nos.

2. Recruiting reinforcements

One of the ways narcissists use triangulation to manipulate their partners into siding with their point of view or acquiesce to their wants and needs is by using third-party reinforcements to substantiate their opinions. This is a form of recruiting allies, or when taken to the extreme, it is flat out bullying. The narcissist tries to manipulate anyone who may hold a different opinion or belief by using the help of an unwitting third party, which of course, has only heard the narcissist’s rendition of the truth.

The third-party is usually oblivious to the narcissist’s ploy and believes they’re only trying to help the narcissist. Usually, the third party is a relative or a member of the narcissist’s fan club. The narcissist uses these innocent people as tools to help settle differences and coerce their partner or anyone else into accepting their viewpoint through the use of persuasion, embarrassment, majority rules or guilt.

In emotionally healthy relationships, couples do not recruit third parties or use messengers to settle their differences. They have face-to-face discussions. They don’t strong arm the other by using a third person to help influence their partner and do their bidding for them. They respect each other and their relationship, and if they cannot come to an agreement, they will seek a qualified, unbiased third-party, such as a therapist, minister or counselor.

3. Splitting

This method of triangulation involves pitting two people against each other. The narcissist does this by smearing the character of one or both of the people behind their backs. This enables the narcissist to preserve their false image and ensures they’re viewed positively among the triangle. In many instances, the narcissist will portray themselves as the victim, especially if they feel their partner is growing tired or aware of their manipulation, hypocrisy, and abuse. The narcissist will react by planning their partner’s discard, by starting a full-fledged smear campaign behind their back. So by the time they dump their partner, the narcissist already has a circle of blind supporters.

The narcissist will usually seek supporters that he/she knows will always agree with them, no matter what. This is how they set up their partner, to look like the abuser in the relationship, long before the relationship is over. For this to work, the narcissist must keep the supporter(s) and partner from sharing information, so the narcissist will usually share mean comments each has said about the other to fuel a rift.

The narcissist uses this triangulation tactic to control the information shared between the parties. It also serves to provide the narcissist with the power of being the primary contact person and transferer of information.  Since everyone is communicating through the narcissist and not with each other, the narcissist can further his/her agenda by relaying their twisted spin on the information between the parties.

Emotionally healthy people tend to shy away from the drama that splitting creates. Most people hate to be put in the middle of other people’s arguments. The narcissist thrives on it. Also, emotionally healthy individuals don’t enjoy hurting others by sharing mean-spirited comments that others have said about them. Again, the narcissist takes much pleasure in it. For example, the narcissist will mention to his/her partner that a family member made a very cruel comment about them, and then pretend to be supportive of their partner’s anger and appear to defend them. Not only does the narcissist get to delight in the hurt expression on their partner’s face, but they get to swoop in like the hero, and pretend to defend their partner. This creates a lot of drama and chaos and is a potent fix of supply for the eternally bored, drama-driven narcissist.

4. The pre-discard and dump

This is the final triangulation tactic used by the narcissist when he/she has decided to end the relationship and discard you. Instead of talking to their partner about this, they will confide in people who they know will agree with them, and believe their rendition of the truth. Sometimes they will confide in people, who hardly even know their partner, if at all. The narcissist will make sure to let their partner know that they have been confiding in other people, and every single one of them agrees with the narcissist. Most likely, one of the narcissist’s confidants will assume the role of the replacement partner.

After the breakup, the narcissist will openly brag about how happy they are with their new partner. And if their ex-partner acts jealous, or tries to beg them back, the narcissist will enjoy the new bonus love-triangle of their own creation.

It goes without saying, that emotionally healthy people don’t talk about something as important as ending a relationship with others without discussing it with their partner’s first. It also goes without saying, that emotionally healthy people don’t shamelessly flaunt their new partners right away since it would cause them to feel embarrassed about entering a new relationship so quickly.

Ironically, in Judo, a triangle choke, is a four-figure chokehold, which strangles the opponent by encircling the opponent’s neck and one arm with the legs in a configuration, similar to the shape of a triangle. The technique constricts the blood flow from the carotid artery to the brain and can cause the fighter to pass out, or even die if left in the hold long enough. For the opponent to release himself from the triangle choke, he needs to tap out, or the referee will jump in to stop the fight. If you see any of the warning signs or behaviors, I’ve listed in your relationship, strongly consider tapping out. You may lose the match, but miraculously, when toxic people leave your life, so does anxiety, depression, and hopelessness.

Bree Bonchay LCSW

Read the full article below:

http://www.freefromtoxic.com/2015/05/13/the-4-most-common-narc-sadistic-triangulation-tactics/

Binge drinking is defined as four or more drinks on an occasion for women, five or more drinks on an occasion for men. Consuming eight or more drinks a week for women or 15 or more drinks a week for men also falls within the binge drinking definition. It turns out millions of Americans fall into the category of binge drinkers. The study found that nearly 1 in 3 adults is an excessive drinker, and most of them binge drink, usually on multiple occasions. The researchers say excessive drinking is responsible for 88,000 deaths in the U.S. each year; 3,700 of those deaths were linked to alcohol dependence. There were also serious health effects from drinking too much in a short time period, such as violence, alcohol poisoning, and car accidents. Here is some practical advice for the holidays. Think about how much alcohol you will consume before arriving at a party, then stick to your decision. If you find it difficult or uncomfortable to stick to your alcohol consumption plan, that is a red flag of a potentially more serious alcohol issue. If you are the host, offer a wide selection of non-alcohol beverages along with a variety of food to snack on. Never push someone to have a drink. Furthermore, if someone is intoxicated, try to discourage him or her from another drink or trying to drive by offering an alternative. The inconvenience of driving a friend home is better than living with only a memory during the holiday season.Constance Scharff PhDFull article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/ending-addiction-good/201412/alcohol-abuse-during-the-holidays%3famp

I have been reading a blog written by a self-confessed Psychopath (who scored 36.8 on Hare’s Psychopathy Checklist) who writes engaging and well-informed articles about his disorder. I’ve always wondered myself about what it is exactly that distinguishes Malignant Narcissism from Psychopathy, because a MN can be every bit as cruel and callous as a psychopath. The primary difference is the Psychopath is not an attention-seeker, but the malignant narcissist is still trapped by his or her need for approval, attention and adulation from others. That is also one of the things (along with impulsivity–which ASPD has in common with BPD–as well as the likelihood of law-breaking) that distinguishes Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) from NPD/malignant narcissism.

There are those who believe that ASPD is on the same spectrum as NPD (but is at the top of the scale, while NPD is in the middle), but I’m not sure if it should be because there are qualitative, not just quantitative, differences. My opinion is that malignant narcissism is high spectrum NPD with ASPD traits. But they still need narcissistic supply. Psychopaths do not.

This writer has an interesting observation–that perhaps the only type of person able to control and/or take down a narcissist is a psychopath. He has little respect for narcissists due to their need for others (even as supply) and emotional sensitivity to rejection and criticism.

The anatomy of a psychopath. Malignant narcissists share with psychopaths the Factor 1 traits, but not Factor 2.

I think this article will explain these differences better than I can.

Narcissism or Psychopathy–Differences?

http://www.psychopathicwritings.com/search/label/Narcissism%20and%20Psychopathy

A Reader asks:

I would be interested in reading anything you wrote on psychopaths need for attention/acceptance. Have you? Like, how would they react to rejection?

Basically the need for attention and acceptance, if it’s a prominent and dominating aspect of what drives a person, is a distinctive trait in Narcissism. As such it is not exclusively something psychopaths are known for.

It is often said that psychopaths have strong narcissistic tendencies, and the statement isn’t completely wrong. But I also often see statements saying Malignant Narcissism and Psychopathy are the same, and this is not the case. There are some very important fundamental differences between psychopaths and malignant narcissists.

Narcissists may be callous and abusive – malignant narcissists definitely are callous and abusive! – and they lack empathy. These are things they have in common with psychopaths. But narcissists have a very strong emotional need for attention or Attention Seeking, Acceptance and Admiration. Their self esteem depends on whether or not they receive these things, and this makes them very vulnerable to rejection and other forms of negative attention such as humiliation, being out shined by someone else, or of being deliberately or naturally ignored.

Psychopaths do not need attention and we certainly do not need acceptance, at least not just for the sake getting it. Their emotional well being does not depend on whether or not they get these things, but they do play a part for most psychopaths’ sense of satisfaction. In this we’re probably not that different from normal people: We like to get attention, to be admired and respected just like everybody else, but we do not feel bad if we don’t get these things.

For psychopaths getting attention and respect from others is most of all a technique to get what they want without having to resort to coercion – threats, blackmail, and physical violence, i.e. – with the same frequency as we otherwise would. Having attention and respect – and acceptance – from others is really only paramount for as far as it is necessary to avoid the risks associated with the more negative techniques. In short: Attention and acceptance to psychopaths are not goals or ends, they’re means to ends.

When we (psychopaths) do care about whether or not we get attention it is not because we have an emotional dependency on being recognized or confirmed by our surroundings. It doesn’t matter to us that people speak badly about us, or that they try to avoid us. Being feared makes an opening for controlling those who fear you, and control leads to possible power.

Making sure you get a lot of attention is also a kind of control, it is a potential opener for gaining power, and it is the central, and often the only, reason why we seek to get it.

This is a well known fact, and the entertainment industry – just to mention one – knows and uses it: Make yourself known, make sure people notice you and that they can’t overlook you, and you have the basis for influencing how people respond to you.

If people like you, there’s a greater chance that they’ll support you or help you in other ways, especially if it’s mutual. <– This is what I’ve chosen to do, but I certainly did not always use a friendly approach. I’ve been very abusive in the past, and it has worked very well for me too. – But I’ve changed in many ways, and I find the mutual idea much more interesting now – and that is good, because it keeps me out of prison, and it has created a good possibility for me to actually do something valuable that others can benefit from… But that was a side note.

Narcissists seek attention and acceptance for it’s own sake, and are miserable if they don’t get it.

Psychopaths seek attention and acceptance because it is part of a technique to get something else. Attention and/or acceptance for it’s own sake doesn’t matter to how a psychopath feels.

A Narcissist, opposite a psychopath, is very vulnerable to Social Rejection and rejection in general. If you deny them admiration and respect, and – more important still – if you humiliate them publicly, you can crush a narcissist completely (provided you do it right and with timing).

Narcissists get very hurt when they get rejected.

Psychopaths do not feel any emotional pain or discomfort when they get rejected.

No narcissistic person can go through public humiliation and not feel emotionally very disturbed by it. With this knowledge one can destroy a narcissist quite easily… This is the typical area of most psychopaths’ expertise, and it is why we so easily can control most narcissistic people. For the same reason most psychopaths have a lot of contempt for narcissistic people. We see individuals who love to abuse and humiliate, but who are even more vulnerable to these things themselves, and it’s hard to find it in your heart to respect such people…

– I suspect we may have this in common with most neurotypicals.

Full article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/luckyottershaven.com/2015/06/27/psychopathy-and-malignant-narcissism-what-is-the-difference/amp/?source=images

Many forensic psychologists, psychiatrists and criminologists use the terms sociopathy and psychopathy interchangeably. Leading experts disagree on whether there are meaningful differences between the two conditions. I contend that there are clear and significant distinctions between them.

The fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), released by the American Psychiatric Association in 2013, lists both sociopathy and psychopathy under the heading of Antisocial Personality Disorders (ASPD). These disorders share many common behavioral traits which lead to the confusion between them. Key traits that sociopaths and psychopaths have in common, include:

• A disregard for laws and social mores

• A disregard for the rights of others

• A failure to feel remorse or guilt

• A tendency to display violent behavior

In addition to their commonalities, sociopaths and psychopaths also have their own unique behavioral characteristics, as well.

Sociopaths tend to be nervous and easily agitated. They are volatile and prone to emotional outbursts, including fits of rage. They are likely to be uneducated and live on the fringes of society, unable to hold down a steady job or stay in one place for very long. It is difficult but not impossible for sociopaths to form attachments with others. Many sociopaths are able to form an attachment to a particular individual or group, although they have no regard for society in general or its rules. In the eyes of others, sociopaths will appear to be very disturbed. Any crimes committed by a sociopath, including murder, will tend to be haphazard, disorganized and spontaneous rather than planned.

Psychopaths, on the other hand, are unable to form emotional attachments or feel real empathy with others, although they often have disarming or even charming personalities. Psychopaths are very manipulative and can easily gain people’s trust. They learn to mimic emotions, despite their inability to actually feel them, and will appear normal to unsuspecting people. Psychopaths are often well educated and hold steady jobs. Some are so good at manipulation and mimicry that they have families and other long-term relationships without those around them ever suspecting their true nature.

When committing crimes, psychopaths carefully plan out every detail in advance and often have contingency plans in place. Unlike their sociopathic counterparts, psychopathic criminals are cool, calm, and meticulous. Their crimes, whether violent or non-violent, will be highly organized and generally offer few clues for authorities to pursue. Intelligent psychopaths make excellent white-collar criminals and “con artists” due to their calm and charismatic natures.

The cause of psychopathy is different than the cause of sociopathy (1). It is believed that psychopathy is the largely the result of “nature” (genetics) while sociopathy is more likely the result of “nurture” (environment). Psychopathy is related to a physiological defect that results in the underdevelopment of the part of the brain responsible for impulse control and emotions. Sociopathy, on the other hand, is more likely the product of childhoodtrauma and physical/emotional abuse. Because sociopathy appears to be learned rather than innate, sociopaths are capable of empathy in certain limited circumstances but not in others, and with a few individuals but not others.

Psychopathy is the most dangerous of all antisocial personality disorders because of the way psychopaths dissociate emotionally from their actions, regardless of how terrible those actions may be. Many prolific and notorious serial killers, including the late Ted Bundy and John Wayne Gacy, and the incarcerated Dennis Rader (“Bind, Torture, Kill” or BTK) are unremorseful psychopaths. Psychopathic killers view their innocent victims as inhuman objects to be tormented and exterminated for their own amusement or even sexual gratification.

Contrary to popular mythology, most serial killers are not mentally ill in either a clinical or legal sense nor are they “evil” geniuses. At least 40 percent of all serial killers are unrepentant psychopaths. See my related article on that topic.

Scott A. Bonn PhD

Full article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/wicked-deeds/201401/how-tell-sociopath-psychopath%3famp

The intentional destruction of others while pathologically loving self

Narcissistic personality disorder is often equated with the selfie-loving, shallow boaster who wears on your patience. However, there is significantly more to the condition. Their behavior and mood are often dependent and driven by feedback from their environment; they typically need the message from others to be a positive one. The impression they wish to make and the intense guarding of their fragile self esteem is a strong determinant of their actions and thoughts.

Some narcissists can become stricken with anger, anxiety, depression, shame, and so forth if the information they receive does not match their inflated, protected inner self. From a neuropsychological standpoint, narcissistic personality disorder reflects problems with self and emotion regulation.

People who meet diagnostic criteria can have extremely fragile and fluctuating self esteem. There is a detachment from their true self. The condition often has a negative impact on the lives of people who love or interact with them.

Symptoms

Narcissistic personality disorder includes symptoms such as poor self identity, inability to appreciate others, entitlement, lack of authenticity, need for control, intolerance of the views/opinions of others, emotional detachment, grandiosity, lack of awareness or concern regarding the impact of their behavior, minimal emotional reciprocity, and a desperate need for the approval and positive attention of others.

Not everyone with pathological narcissism or narcissistic personality disorder will have the same presentation of the condition. There is heterogeneity, of course, because people are complex. There are differing levels of intensity and dimensions. For example, some with pathological narcissism are shy and avoidant (vulnerable), while others are primarily outgoing and overtly boastful (grandiose).

Cluster B Personality Disorders

Narcissistic personality disorder falls under the category of Cluster B Personality Disorders within the DSM-5. The conditions under this grouping include Borderline Personality, Narcissistic Personality, Histrionic Personality, and Antisocial Personality. Psychopathy, a condition marked by a lack of conscience, incapacity to bond, aggression, and interpersonal violations, is a subgroup within Antisocial Personality Disorder.

Although the disorders are distinct and reflect different categories of symptoms, it would not be unusual for someone to have symptoms of more than one Cluster B condition. As many psychologists and psychiatrists will attest, the personality profile of our patients does not always fit into a nice little box. There can be traits of other personality disorders that accompany the main condition. Take, for example, the combination of narcissistic and antisocial personality in describing malignant narcissism.

Self-Enhancement

“I am so smart! My IQ is above140.”

Self-enhancement is a prominent feature of narcissistic personality disorder, regardless of the dimension. They view themselves in an overly positive light and believe they are unique and superior to others. In a meta-analysis review, researchers Grijalva and Zhang explored the insightof individuals with narcissistic personality disorder. The studies supported that people high in narcissism tend to over-estimate or exaggerate their abilities, status (for example, intelligence), and looks, more than could be supported by reality.

They believe they are better than other people, and usually the variables that are self-enhanced are related to “power and status” (agency). Even if evidence to the contrary is presented, such as the results of an IQ test. Often that reality will be challenged, rather than accepted. They might become extremely defensive and verbally attack or degrade the examiner who gave the test or the test itself (“What a stupid test!”). Indisputable evidence of their inaccurate, overly inflated self-assessment does not change the self-view of someone high in narcissism.

Vulnerability

“Make them believe I’m smart and handsome. I won’t stand for anything else!”

In Section III of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorder, Fifth Edition (“Alternative DSM-5 Model for Personality Disorders”), conditions associated with personality are conceptualized differently from the current diagnostic criteria. Consideration is given to both an individual’s “functioning” as well as personality “traits” and are considered along a continuum, with dimensions. As a clinician, I find this approach more in line with the complexity of human behavior.

With regard to Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Section III highlights that people with this condition have “vulnerable self-esteem.” This is regardless of whether the person is extroverted or introverted, or of the “vulnerable” or “grandiose” variants. They require regulation from the outside world to maintain many facets of the self. Therefore, they often use people to stabilize their emotions and the feelings they have regarding who they are and what they want to do or be.

The Brain, Pathological Narcissism, and Empathy

Research indicates that individuals diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder have some of the neurobiological impairments of psychopathy. This makes sense, given that narcissistic personality disorder is suspected to fall along a spectrum that includes psychopathy. One neuroimaging study found those with narcissistic personality disorder to have problems associated with the right anterior insular cortex — a region of the brain suspected to be associated with empathy.

In a 2013 publication, using neuroimaging, researchers from the University of Germany examined the brain patterns of individuals with narcissistic personality disorder. They yielded similar findings to the aforementioned study. The group that met criteria for the condition demonstrated smaller gray matter volume within areas of the brain associated with “emotional empathy” (the anterior insula and the fronto-paralimbic areas).

Neuroscience studies of this nature lend considerable evidence that people with pathological narcissism have limited capacity to interact pro-socially with society. Faulty brain functions are a significant hindrance.

Dimensions of Narcissistic Personality Disorder

There is more to narcissism than intensity levels. Studies have identified the presence of dimensions. Some researchers refer to them as variants or subtypes, however Kenneth Levy’s 2012 review of the literature suggests it is likely most accurate to view the variants of this condition as dimensions and “dynamic.” This reflects the reality of narcissistic personality disorder, whereby an individual can show patterns of more than one variant. The two most commonly described dimensions or variants in research are grandiose and vulnerable:

• Grandiose. The descriptors often offered for this pattern of narcissism are extroversion, overt attention seeking, and grandiosity.

• Vulnerable. This reflects a neurotic style whereby an individual demonstrates a quieter/introverted presentation, anxiety, mood problems, avoidance, and modesty.

Malignant Narcissism

I want to explore with you the darker side of narcissistic personality disorder, where aggression, antisocial behaviors, and suspiciousness are as prominent as their poor sense of self, fragility, and egocentricity. (Below is a video clip that explores the symptoms of malignant narcissism.)

A person with malignant narcissism has the potential to destroy families, communities, nations, and work environments. This condition reflects a hybrid or blending of narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders. Psychologist Eric Fromm termed the disorder in 1964. Psychoanalyst Otto Kernberg later delineated the symptoms of the condition and presented it as an intermediary between narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders.

Why is the behavior of malignant narcissism often considered dangerous?

Individuals with this profile can form connections with others. However, they process information in ways that can hurt society in general, but also the people who love or depend on them. Family, co-workers, employees, and others in their lives often have to walk on eggshells to appease a fragile ego and minimize the occurrence of their unstable, impulsive, or aggressive behaviors.

They lash out or humiliate others for infractions of even the most frivolous nature (for example, you gave an opinion that differed from theirs; you demonstrated confidence, and it made them look bad; you told a joke that involved poking fun at them).

For some, their grandiosity and protection of their fragile “true self” can be at such extreme levels that they will lie and give the impression that simply because they say it, that makes it reality. Many will become angered if their lies are challenged with truth or facts. Of course, this can create problems for the people close to them, as this pattern of behavior can easily veer into gaslighting.

Malignant narcissism is a blend of two disorders that pose problems interpersonally for their victims — narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders. It is not uncommon for others to feel anxious, intimidated by, and fearful of people with this condition. The combination of poor empathy coupled with aggression, hypersensitivity, and suspiciousness can bring pain to others.

Those who interact with malignant narcissists often consider them jealous, petty, thin-skinned, punitive, hateful, cunning, and angry. Given their shallowness, they are not regulated emotionally and have beliefs that swing from one extreme to the next.

Their decisions can hurt others, because they rank relationships and people based on superficial standards and categories. They want to land on top, even when pretending to be altruistic or engaging in an activity that should not be “all about them.” They often view the world through a primitive binary lens (for example, winner/loser; smart/dumb; rich/poor; pretty/ugly; black/white) — all the while sustaining the belief that they are superior. This is likely associated with problems processing emotional information, which reflects faulty neurobiology.

Narcissistic and Antisocial Personality Disorder (subgroup inclusion of Psychopathy)

Researchers Gunderson and Ronningstam reviewed the works of Robert Hare, creator of the Psychopathy Checklist, and Otto Kernberg, MD (i.e., malignant narcissism). They cited that both individuals found narcissistic personality disorder to be a component of or veer into other conditions that are related, such as antisocial personality disorder and psychopathy.

Both Hare and Kernberg discuss the inclusion of narcissistic personality disorder within more sinister, destructive personality types. Given that it seems there is a high correlation between antisocial and narcissistic personality disorders, Gunderson and Ronningstam decided to explore whether or not narcissistic personality disorder is truly a condition that is distinct from antisocial personality.

They found that grandiosity was a significant discriminator between antisocial and narcissistic personality. Specifically, individuals with narcissistic personality tended to be “boastful,” arrogant, and grandiose regarding their abilities and achievements. Although they determined that both groups (ASPD and NPD) exploit others, exploitation was more apt to be the goal of those with antisocial personality.

Although I have presented the viewpoint of a narcissism spectrum, some researchers take the angle of an antisocial spectrum, while others consider each of the Cluster B disorders as overlapping.

I am in agreement with research that conceptualizes personality disorders, such as narcissistic personality and antisocial personality, as falling along a continuum. Across the continuum or spectrum will be different blends of the disorder, distinct, however, composed of symptoms of each other. I think that the overlap is often significant, and the current categorical classifications of personality often leave out blends of personality that we see with our patients — for example, malignant narcissism, psychopathy with borderline traits, introverted narcissism.

Rhonda Freeman PhD

The complete article can be found:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/neurosagacity/201702/how-recognize-malignant-narcissist%3famp

As we approach the end of June and World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness, we will begin to explore in depth, the behavior patterns and descriptors for all personality disorders. Let’s begin with a brief introduction to the 10. A short, sharp look into the 10 personality disorders. The study of human personality or “character” (from the Greek charaktêr, the mark impressed upon a coin) dates back at least to antiquity. In his Characters, Tyrtamus (371-287 B.C.) — nicknamed Theophrastus or “divinely speaking” by his contemporary Aristotle — divided the people of 4th century B.C. Athens into 30 different personality types, including “arrogance,” “irony,” and “boastfulness.” Characters exerted a strong influence on subsequent studies of human personality, such as those of Thomas Overbury (1581-1613) in England and Jean de la Bruyère (1645-1696) in France.The concept of personality disorder itself is much more recent and tentatively dates back to psychiatrist Philippe Pinel’s 1801 description of manie sans délire, a condition which he characterized as outbursts of rage and violence (manie) in the absence of any symptoms of psychosis, such as delusions and hallucinations (délires).Across the English Channel, physician JC Prichard (1786-1848) coined the term “moral insanity” in 1835 to refer to a larger group of people who were characterized by “morbid perversion of the natural feelings, affections, inclinations, temper, habits, moral dispositions and natural impulses,” but the term, probably considered too broad and non-specific, soon fell into disuse.Some 60 years later, in 1896, psychiatrist Emil Kraepelin (1856-1926) described seven forms of antisocial behavior under the umbrella of “psychopathic personality,” a term later broadened by Kraepelin’s younger colleague Kurt Schneider (1887-1967) to include those who “suffer from their abnormality.”Schneider’s seminal volume of 1923, Die psychopathischen Persönlichkeiten (Psychopathic Personalities), still forms the basis of current classifications of personality disorders, such as those contained in the influential American classification of mental disorders, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 5th Revision (DSM-5).According to DSM-5, a personality disorder can be diagnosed if there are significant impairments in self and interpersonal functioning together with one or more pathological personality traits. In addition, these features must be (1) relatively stable across time and consistent across situations, (2) not better understood as normative for the individual’s developmental stage or socio-cultural environment, and (3) not solely due to the direct effects of a substance or general medical condition.The DSM-5 lists 10 personality disorders and allocates each to one of three groups or “clusters”: A, B, or C.Cluster A (Odd, bizarre, eccentric)Paranoid PD, Schizoid PD, Schizotypal PDCluster B (Dramatic, erratic)Antisocial PD, Borderline PD, Histrionic PD, Narcissistic PDCluster C (Anxious, fearful)Avoidant PD, Dependent PD, Obsessive-compulsive PDBefore going on to characterize these 10 personality disorders, it should be emphasized that they are more the product of historical observation than of scientific study, and thus that they are rather vague and imprecise constructs. As a result, they rarely present in their classic “textbook” form, but instead tend to blur into one another. Their division into three clusters in DSM-5 is intended to reflect this tendency, with any given personality disorder most likely to blur with other personality disorders within its cluster. For instance, in cluster A, paranoid personality is most likely to blur with schizoid personality disorder and schizotypal personality disorder.The majority of people with a personality disorder never come into contact with mental health services, and those who do usually do so in the context of another mental disorder or at a time of crisis, commonly after self-harming or breaking the law. Nevertheless, personality disorders are important to health professionals, because they predispose to mental disorder and affect the presentation and management of existing mental disorders. They also result in considerable distress and impairment, and so may need to be treated “in their own right.” Whether this ought to be the remit of the health professions is a matter of debate and controversy, especially with regard to those personality disorders which predispose to criminal activity, and which are often treated with the primary purpose of preventing crime.1. Paranoid personality disorderCluster A is comprised of paranoid, schizoid, and schizotypal personality disorders. Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive distrust of others, including even friends, family, and partners. As a result, this person is guarded, suspicious, and constantly on the lookout for clues or suggestions to validate his fears. He also has a strong sense of personal rights: He is overly sensitive to setbacks and rebuffs, easily feels shame and humiliation, and persistently bears grudges. Unsurprisingly, he tends to withdraw from others and to struggle with building close relationships. The principal ego defense in paranoid PD is projection, which involves attributing one’s unacceptable thoughts and feelings to other people. A large, long-term twin study found that paranoid PD is modestly heritable, and that it shares a portion of its genetic and environmental risk factors with schizoid PD and schizotypal PD.2. Schizoid personality disorderThe term “schizoid” designates a natural tendency to direct attention toward one’s inner life and away from the external world. A person with schizoid PD is detached and aloof and prone to introspection and fantasy. He has no desire for social or sexual relationships, is indifferent to others and to social norms and conventions, and lacks emotional response. A competing theory about people with schizoid PD is that they are in fact highly sensitive with a rich inner life: They experience a deep longing for intimacy, but find initiating and maintaining close relationships too difficult or distressing, and so retreat into their inner world. People with schizoid PD rarely present to medical attention, because despite their reluctance to form close relationships, they are generally well functioning and quite untroubled by their apparent oddness.3. Schizotypal disorderSchizotypal PD is characterized by oddities of appearance, behavior, and speech, unusual perceptual experiences, and anomalies of thinking similar to those seen in schizophrenia. These latter can include odd beliefs, magical thinking (for instance, thinking that speaking of the devil can make him appear), suspiciousness, and obsessive ruminations. People with schizotypal PD often fear social interaction and think of others as harmful. This may lead them to develop so-called ideas of reference — that is, beliefs or intuitions that events and happenings are somehow related to them. So whereas people with schizotypal PD and people with schizoid PD both avoid social interaction, with the former it is because they fear others, whereas with the latter it is because they have no desire to interact with others or find interacting with others too difficult. People with schizotypal PD have a higher than average probability of developing schizophrenia, and the condition used to be called “latent schizophrenia.”4. Antisocial personality disorderCluster B is comprised of antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic personality disorders. Until psychiatrist Kurt Schneider (1887-1967) broadened the concept of personality disorder to include those who “suffer from their abnormality,” personality disorder was more or less synonymous with antisocial personality disorder. Antisocial PD is much more common in men than in women and is characterized by a callous unconcern for the feelings of others. The person disregards social rules and obligations, is irritable and aggressive, acts impulsively, lacks guilt, and fails to learn from experience. In many cases, he has no difficulty finding relationships — and can even appear superficially charming (the so-called “charming psychopath“) — but these relationships are usually fiery, turbulent, and short-lived. As antisocial PD is the mental disorder most closely correlated with crime, he is likely to have a criminal record or a history of being in and out of prison.5. Borderline personality disorderIn borderline PD (or emotionally unstable PD), the person essentially lacks a sense of self and, as a result, experiences feelings of emptiness and fears of abandonment. There is a pattern of intense but unstable relationships, emotional instability, outbursts of anger and violence (especially in response to criticism), and impulsive behavior. Suicidal threats and acts of self-harm are common, for which reason many people with borderline PD frequently come to medical attention. Borderline PD was so called, because it was thought to lie on the “borderline” between neurotic (anxiety) disorders and psychotic disorders, such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. It has been suggested that borderline personality disorder often results from childhood sexual abuse, and that it is more common in women, in part because women are more likely to suffer sexual abuse. However, feminists have argued that borderline PD is more common in women, because women presenting with angry and promiscuous behavior tend to be labeled with it, whereas men presenting with similar behaviour tend instead to be labeled with antisocial PD.6. Histrionic personality disorderPeople with histrionic PD lack a sense of self-worth and depend on attracting the attention and approval of others for their wellbeing. They often seem to be dramatizing or “playing a part” in a bid to be heard and seen. Indeed, “histrionic” derives from the Latin histrionicus, “pertaining to the actor.” People with histrionic PD may take great care of their appearance and behave in a manner that is overly charming or inappropriately seductive. As they crave excitement and act on impulse or suggestion, they can place themselves at risk of accident or exploitation. Their dealings with others often seem insincere or superficial, which in the longer term can adversely impact their social and romantic relationships. This is especially distressing to them, as they are sensitive to criticism and rejection and react badly to loss or failure. A vicious circle may take hold in which the more rejected they feel, the more histrionic they become — and the more histrionic they become, the more rejected they feel. It can be argued that a vicious circle of some kind is at the heart of every personality disorder and, indeed, every mental disorder.7. Narcissistic personality disorderIn narcissistic PD, the person has an extreme feeling of self-importance, a sense of entitlement, and a need to be admired. He is envious of others and expects them to be the same of him. He lacks empathy and readily lies and exploits others to achieve his aims. To others, he may seem self-absorbed, controlling, intolerant, selfish, or insensitive. If he feels obstructed or ridiculed, he can fly into a fit of destructive anger and revenge. Such a reaction is sometimes called “narcissistic rage” and can have disastrous consequences for all those involved.8. Avoidant personality disorderCluster C is comprised of avoidant, dependent, and anankastic personality disorders. People with avoidant PD believe that they are socially inept, unappealing, or inferior, and constantly fear being embarrassed, criticized, or rejected. They avoid meeting others unless they are certain of being liked and are restrained even in their intimate relationships. Avoidant PD is strongly associated with anxiety disorders, and may also be associated with actual or felt rejection by parents or peers in childhood. Research suggests that people with avoidant PD excessively monitor internal reactions, both their own and those of others, which prevents them from engaging naturally or fluently in social situations. A vicious circle takes hold in which the more they monitor their internal reactions, the more inept they feel; and the more inept they feel, the more they monitor their internal reactions.9. Dependent personality disorderDependent PD is characterized by a lack of self-confidence and an excessive need to be looked after. This person needs a lot of help in making everyday decisions and surrenders important life decisions to the care of others. He greatly fears abandonment and may go through considerable lengths to secure and maintain relationships. A person with dependent PD sees himself as inadequate and helpless, and so surrenders his personal responsibility and submits himself to one or more protective others. He imagines that he is at one with these protective other(s), whom he idealizes as competent and powerful, and towards whom he behaves in a manner that is ingratiating and self-effacing. People with dependent PD often end up with people with a cluster B personality disorder, who feed on the unconditional high regard in which they are held. Overall, people with dependent PD maintain a naïve and child-like perspective and have limited insight into themselves and others. This entrenches their dependency, leaving them vulnerable to abuse and exploitation.10. Anankastic (obsessive-compulsive) personality disorderAnankastic PD is characterized by an excessive preoccupation with details, rules, lists, order, organization, or schedules; perfectionism so extreme that it prevents a task from being completed; and devotion to work and productivity at the expense of leisure and relationships. A person with anankastic PD is typically doubting and cautious, rigid and controlling, humorless, and miserly. His underlying anxiety arises from a perceived lack of control over a world that eludes his understanding, and the more he tries to exert control, the more out of control he feels. As a consequence, he has little tolerance for complexity or nuance, and tends to simplify the world by seeing things as either all good or all bad. His relationships with colleagues, friends, and family are often strained by the unreasonable and inflexible demands that he makes upon them.Closing remarksWhile personality disorders may differ from mental disorders, like schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, they do, by definition, lead to significant impairment. They are estimated to affect about 10 percent of people, although this figure ultimately depends on where clinicians draw the line between a “normal” personality and one that leads to significant impairment. Characterizing the 10 personality disorders is difficult, but diagnosing them reliably is even more so. For instance, how far from the norm must personality traits deviate before they can be counted as disordered? How significant is “significant impairment”? And how is “impairment” to be defined?Whatever the answers to these questions, they are bound to include a large part of subjectivity. Personal dislike, prejudice, or a clash of values can all play a part in arriving at a diagnosis of personality disorder, and it has been argued that the diagnosis amounts to little more than a convenient label for undesirables and social deviants.Neel Burton, MDThe full article can be found: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/hide-and-seek/201205/the-10-personality-disorders%3famp

What is alcoholism? According to the American Medical Association, “alcoholism is an illness characterized by significant impairment that is directly associated with persistent and excessive use of alcohol. Impairment may involve physiological, psychological or social dysfunction.” Psychologically speaking, alcoholism has less to do with “how much” someone is drinking, and more to do with what happens when they drink. If you have problems when you drink, you have a drinking problem.

The word alcohol comes from the Arabic “Al Kohl,” which means “the essence.” Alcohol has always been associated with rites of passages such as weddings and graduations, social occasions, sporting events and parties. The media has often glamorized drinking. Television viewers happily recount the Budweiser frog, the beach parties and general “good time” feeling of commercials selling beer. Magazine ads show beautiful couples sipping alcohol. Love, sex and romance are just around the corner as long as you drink the alcohol product being advertised.

The reality is that alcohol is often abused because it initially offers a very tantalizing promise. With mild intoxication, many people become more relaxed. They feel more carefree. Any preexisting problems tend to fade into the background. Alcohol can be used to enhance a good mood or change a bad mood. At first, alcohol allows the drinker to feel quite pleasant, with no emotional costs. As an individual’s drinking progresses, however, it takes more and more alcohol to achieve the same high. Eventually the high is hardly present.

How Common is Alcoholism?

Alcoholism is a complex disease, which has been misunderstood and stigmatized. According to the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), Alcohol Dependence and Alcohol Abuse are among the most common mental disorders in the general population, with about eight percent of the adult population suffering from Alcohol Dependence and five percent from Alcohol Abuse.

It is widely accepted that there is a genetic predisposition toward alcoholism. According to DSM-IV, the risk for Alcohol Dependence is three to four times higher in close relative of people with Alcohol Dependence.

The Progression of the Disease

Alcoholism is a progressive disease and follows several phases:

The Social Drinker: Social drinkers have few problems with alcohol. A social drinker can basically take or leave it. There is no preoccupation with drinking. A social drinker is able to control the amount of alcohol consumed and rarely drinks to the point of intoxication. For these individuals, drinking is a secondary activity. It is the party, the meal, the wedding that interests the social drinker, not the opportunity to drink.

The Early Stage: An individual who is experiencing the early stages of alcoholism will begin to have an assortment of problems associated with drinking. In early stage alcoholism, a person may start to sneak drinks, begin to feel guilty about his or her drinking, and become preoccupied with alcohol. Blackouts, drinking to the point of drunkenness, and increased tolerance (needing more alcohol to achieve the same effect) are all signs of early alcoholism.

An individual who is entering the early stage of alcoholism will seek out companions who are heavy drinkers and lose interest in activities not associated with drinking. Family and friends may begin to express concern about the person’s consumption of alcohol. Work problems, such as missing work or tardiness, may also take place.

Middle Stage: By the time someone has entered the middle stages of alcoholism, his or her life has become quite unmanageable, although the alcoholic still denies that he or she has a problem. At this point, the alcoholic will often drink more than intended. He or she will drink in an attempt to erase feelings such as anger, depression and social discomfort. Drinking in the morning to relieve a bad hangover may also take place. The alcoholic’s health care provider may begin to suggest that the alcoholic stop drinking. The individual may try to stop drinking, but without success. Job loss, medical problems, and serious family conflicts occur during this phase.

Late Stage: At this stage, the alcoholic’s life has become completely unmanageable. Medical complications are numerous and include liver diseases such as cirrhosis or hepatitis. Acute pancreatitis (inflammation of the pancreas), high blood pressure, and bleeding of the esophageal lining can result from prolonged use. The heart and brain are compromised so that an alcoholic is at a higher risk for a heart attack or stroke. Depression and insomnia and even suicide are more prevalent at this stage.

A condition known as Wernicke-Korsakoff Syndrome, which involves memory loss, indicates that the individual has sustained brain damage from drinking. A child born to a woman who drinks during her pregnancy may have a condition called fetal alcohol syndrome, causing a number of birth defects.

An alcoholic at this stage has become physically addicted to alcohol and will experience seizures or delirium tremens (DTs) if he or she stops drinking. It is extremely important to seek out medical care at this point in the disease process.

Treatment

If an individual is dependent on alcohol, he or she should be supervised medically during a detoxification process. Further treatment may include individual or group counseling.

Mental health professionals have been trained to treat substance abuse problems. You can seek out treatment with an individual counselor or by entering an inpatient or outpatient substance abuse treatment program.

Support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous, Smart Recovery, and Rational Recovery have helped many alcoholics to stay sober, allowing them to live productive lives.

-Cynthia Mascott, LMHC

Full article: https://psychcentral.com/lib/alcoholism-and-its-treatment/?all=1

Personality Types Who Fall For Narcissists: Are You One? Wondering why you fell for a narcissist, or if you’re the type who might attract or be attracted to them? If you’re part of the club, it’s no surprise that you may not want to be a member, but it doesn’t reflect badly on you. Some of the strongest, smartest, most compassionate people end up snagged in the narcissist’s web, only to find a way out. And if you’re lucky enough to have avoided it, this might help you keep it that way.

Here are four common personality types who are more likely than most to fall for narcissists.

1.  You Were Raised by Narcissists

If you were raised by one or more narcissist parents/stepparents, that makes you more susceptible to falling into further relationships with narcissists. Whether as lovers, friends, or bosses, they seem to reappear in your life, with you playing the familiar role, which can range from enabler, to supplier, to golden child, to scapegoat, to everything in between.

It is normal, even logical, to replay familiar life roles. It is the brain’s and body’s way of trying to learn and heal. The good news is that you can break your pattern with narcissists. Think of your reenacting relationships as your way of learning to overcome and move on.

2.  You’re an Empath

As a person highly aware of others’ experiences and emotions, you are exceptionally attuned and in some cases more vulnerable to exploitation by people who lack empathy—a state of being that for most of us, and especially you, is difficult to comprehend.

The person with narcissist personality disorder is believed to suffer from overindulgent or overpraising and/or neglectful or abusive parenting, a formatively invalidating environment from which she overcompensates with an arrogant false face and a competitive will to assert her superiority over everyone in her world.

Some theorize that people who develop narcissistic personalities are by nature unusually sensitive and that their intolerable experience of invalidation—loss, abuse, or overindulgence—turns their perceptive gifts into destructive means of manipulating and hurting others.

3.  You Struggle with Low Self-Esteem

People with low self-esteem, often as a result of abusive or devaluing childhood experiences, including physical and sexual violation, are vulnerable to narcissists. You have been taught that you don’t deserve decency, affection, boundaries, stability, or unconditional love. You may have never seen a real-life example of kindness, let alone love, and yet you deserve both things as much as anyone does.

Narcissists pray on vulnerable people, who will bend to their will but preferably also elevate them in some way—by being good-looking, rich or at least good earners, intelligent, professionally accomplished, charming, and so on.

4.  You Are a Rescuer

You want to help, cure, restore, repair, protect, defend, and fight before it’s too late. You want to save people, animals, groups, and causes from harm and injustice. You want to kick ass to make things better.

And the narcissist may be your biggest challenge yet. But the secret is out: You can’t cure the narcissist, and you usually can’t ever teach them even the basics of empathy. Maybe you can make her/him a little bit better. The real question is, Is it worth it? 

We all of us make mistakes in love and life. And if we’re wise, strong, and brave enough we find a way to heal and move on.

Julie L. Hall

Full Article:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_58d15a27e4b0e0d348b34830/amp

Here we discuss the tragedy of mental illness, alcoholism, and personality disorders. We discuss the behavior patterns of “love bombing” a new partner, Phases of Narcissistic Emotional Abuse and Gaslighting. We describe what to look for in dual diagnosis and alcoholism. These scenarios are very real, they exist, and they follow specific, documented clinical patterns of behavior and they are often very, very difficult to see. Sometimes you won’t see it for many years if you’re not really, closely looking. The truest sadness is not for the victims of emotional abuse from a Narcissist. The survivors will likely become stronger, empowered, knowledgeable and will heal by sheer will and the need to understand and prevent any future abuse from another covert malignant Narcissist. These Narcissists do have specific features, qualities, and types they look for and seek out to use as their needs morph and change.

The greatest sadness and tragedy in all of this is the lost, miserable, empty souls who truly believe their problem is not within themselves. The lost and deeply ill individual who goes from relationship to relationship, eventually sabotaging them all throughout their lifetime while not accepting that their misery and unhappiness lies within themselves and their unresolved pain, not in those around them.

The tragedy is also for the children of the Narcissist who become lifelong collateral damage. The damaged parent-child relationships that never truly get repaired and exist only on the surface, if that at all. The adult children will frequently distance themselves from the repetition of chaos and disappointment that parent brings to their life.

By not seeking the help they desperately need it allows this illness, this disease, to grow and last a lifetime if left untreated. The lost soul, fearful of losing their professional identity upon retiring, the aging soul who every few years changes spouses, partners, may resort to moving and changing communities, estrange themselves from lifelong friends, desperately and drastically lower their own established, long standing high standards of partners and social circles, discard beloved hobbies, lower lifestyle standards and regular interests and goals. They will suddenly seek to reinvent themselves once again through another source because something just isn’t working yet again–but it’s never themselves that are broken in their own minds. The blame for their emptiness is directed at their current partner, and the established pattern continues. This is the reality of this mental disease.

The word disease itself should be seen and broken down, it is “dis-ease” with their own identity and entire existence. These are the souls who sadly, without help, will eventually have nothing and no one of real value left in their lives. Over the years they will ostracize themselves from lifelong friends, and seek to reinvent that which is no longer working in their minds. The solution is unfounded, and it is always temporary. The fix for their self-hatred and deep self-loathing hidden beneath excessive, self-centered, self-love (Narcissism) isn’t found outside themselves where they are seeking to find it. This is why they are always unsuccessful. This is when their disappointment, their discontentedness with themselves and their life hits them hard once again and they return to their familiar darkness only to begin again with a new Narcissistic source.

The Idealization of found perfection in Phase 1 begins to fade and fail them once again, then the Phase 2 devaluing and subtle emotional abuse begins again, then eventually on to Phase 3 of discarding and replacing where the completed cycle begins all over again with someone new. The unsuspecting, far removed stranger. There too, as evidenced by past patterns of behavior, they will eventually find imperfection in the currently idealized, suddenly see flaws and faults (humanness) in that which they once felt was perfection, their salvation and solution, and then begin again to devalue them as well. This process and cycle can go on for years.

The reason for failure is quite simple. There is only one true way to happiness, peace, joy, and contentment. Those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and High Functioning Alcoholism are missing the one key to it all. Finding, admitting, seeing and accepting that key is up to them. There is only one way to possibly recover from this type of mental illness, this complex personality disorder and addiction. It is through professional intervention and treatment, and reconnecting to the foundation of one’s faith and what makes one’s life purposeful, meaningful, complete, and truly whole. The genuine giving of yourself without ulterior motives for personal gain.

The victims of Narcissistic Emotional Abuse can and usually do recover completely over time. The abusers however, are unlikely to see themselves as they truly are by the pure nature of their illness. They possess an inability to truly like and deeply love and respect themselves (or another) for anything that isn’t money related, superficial or material. Everything lies above the surface. All depth is forged, mirrored and temporary. They are able to mask it for long periods, but eventually the mask will fall. It always will, and it always does. And the vicious, restless, fruitless cycle of chasing wholeness begins all over, once again without end.